wife, mother, ph.d. student, hot stuff.

Friday, March 04, 2005

Girls Only...

I've spent my life surrounded by boys:
- I have 2 younger brothers, the youngest is only 3 years younger than me.
- Robin has no sisters, so when I visit my in-laws, I spend a fair amount of time with my brother-in-law (who is one cool cat, btw).
- I attended a science/engineering magnet program in HS, a Tech college, and a Tech grad school. So I spent most of my formative years in places where the great majority of my peers were male.

As a result, throughout my life, most of my best friends have been guys. This is not to say that I don't have girlfriends. But they have tended to be sporadic, both in space and in time. And rarely did I ever hang out with girls only. So while I occasionally enjoyed hanging out with just the girls, I didn't ever think of it as something I particularly needed.

I think I've finally been converted.

For New Year's, Robin and I, along with 2 other friends, visited college friends in Seattle. There were 6 of us, and 2 cars. We ended up with a girl car and a boy car. It wasn't that we didn't want to be with the boys; after all, 4 of us were in married couple form. But when we went shopping, out to lunch or dinner, drove up to the mountains to go sledding, and made the trek to Vancouver, we split off into girls vs boys.

At first, I didn't really think about it. In my mind, I was maximizing the utility of my time away from home by spending time in a car that didn't include my husband (I see him all the time, I don't need to be with him 24/7).

We were on our way back from Vancouver when suddenly, it all came together. Ady and I were chatting about our lives, our plans for the future, as Laura dozed in the back. We stopped at a gas station while the boys filled up their SUV, and Ady acquired some soda. Revitalized, we got back on the road, and turned up the music. I think "Buttercup" reached the top of the Ipod queue, and Ady and Laura broke out singing at the top of their lungs. I felt like I was in a warm, cozy bubble, shooting along the highway. I leaned my forehead against the cool glass of the passenger side window, and tried to put my finger on what I was feeling.

Clearly, a good portion of it was just good vibes from good friends. But there was something more. There are certain things that only other girls understand; the joy of pawing through underwear bins at a Victoria's Secret sale, for instance. Or the little pangs of the heart when seeing other people's babies. It felt really great to share these vibes with more than 1 person at a time. (my daily/weekly interactions with girls are limited to a housemate and one college friend, both of whom are in grad school and are really busy.)

I miss my girls. Thank you, for teaching me the good that is all girl.